OK, today’s post touches on a topic that has nothing to do with marketing on the web, but it’s another exciting chapter in Dr. Dick’s story, so bear with me. At the urging of my wife, who has not only endured what she claims is “buzz saw” snoring (surely she is delusional!), but who says she has observed me actually stop breathing while sleeping for an agonizing number of seconds, I went down to Riverside Methodist Hospital in here Columbus for a “sleep test.” This is actually a test for sleep apnea, a somewhat serious medical condition that may lead to heart damage (or so the docs say). Last week, they put about a gazillion wires all over my head, a couple on my chest, and two on each leg, and asked me to “sleep normally” on a bed that was hard as a rock. Needless to say, I did not “sleep normally”, but I made it through the night. Friday, the Doc (a neurologist, with apologies to my much older brother, who is also one) had his receptionist call me to tell me I needed to come back. (That means I flunked the “sleep test.” Maybe I just didn’t study for it hard enough.) So last night, in addition to all the wires and the rock hard bed, I got to wear one of these:
(That’s NOT ME, by the way.) I started out wondering WHY the CIA invented water boarding when they could have just forced terrorists to wear this CPAP (that’s Continuous Positive Airway Pressure) mask. If you don’t like the mask, I’m hearing all kinds of ads on Fox News (fair and balanced!) for NoMask.com, where they will be happy to sell you one of these:
(That’s NOT ME, either!) For some reason, this reminds me of when my (now adult) children were in their formative years, and their favorite expression was “Up your nose with a rubber hose!” (sounds like Dave Barry to me). After confessing to multiple planned acts of terror, I made it through the night. The mask actually wasn’t all that bad (I thought I’d be much more claustrophobic). The bed and the wires were worse. Now I have to wait two weeks so the Doc can “digest” all my data and decide if I’m worthy to receive my own personal CPAP machine and mask (hopefully paid for by my health insurance or Obamacare one).
So if your spouse tells you that you snore, get her (or him) a pair of EARPLUGS! Well, unless you are really failing to breathe while you sleep, because that’s NOT a good thing. If you’re doing that, go see your doctor. And then you and I can sing the “Sleep Apnea Blues” together!
Dr. Dick
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I saw something about this on TV last night
Seriously bro, stop having an obsession over Pride vs. UFC – It’s not healthy.
Hey, I loved the post. I recently celebrated 6 years of using a device at night and I am still unbelievably satisfied with the results. My wife is happier than ever as well. Plus, I’m sure the machines are getting better as time goes on. Anyway, keep up the great work!
I’ve been using mine for a couple of nights already. I seem to sleep better, but I’m still getting used to it. I know I got a few laughs out of this, but sleep apnea is a SERIOUS matter. If your spouse notices that your breathing stops while you sleep, go see a doctor, folks! Dr. D
Dr. Dick, I just recently started getting treated by my chirpractor using the Cranial Electrotherapy Stimulator. I don’t know if it will help my snoring, but it is suppose to help with being able to sleep and get rested. This therapy is also known to help depression, anxiety, and bodily functions through the nervous system and organs. The concept is training the brain to help the body rest so it can heal.
Al
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I am always looking for additional information on this topic as well as others. I found your site very informative and well written. Your layout is easy to follow and I appreciate your contribution to the topic.
Hrmm that was weird, my comment got eaten. Anywho I wanted to say that it’s nice to know that someone else also touched on this as I had trouble finding the same information elsewhere. This was the first place that helped me understand this. Thanks.
The advocates of waterboarding have yet to explain why they want to permit this. There is no evidence that torture produces useful information unobtainable by other interrogation methods. Without such justification, there can be no reason even to consider waterboarding, and certainly no reason to defend it.
lol some of the remarks bloggers post really are a bit spacey, every so often i think whether they realistically read the content articles and posts before putting a comment or whether they only gloss over the article title and write the first ideas that pops into their brain. anyway, it really is helpful to read clever commentary occasionally in contrast to the exact same, old opinion which i frequently notice through the web.
For what it’s worth, I’m not advocating waterboarding. I was making a joke. Maybe you need to lighten up a little… Dr. D
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whaaaat this is the best post ever aha.
I’ve been using mine for a couple of nights already. I seem to sleep better, but I’m still getting used to it. I know I got a few laughs out of this, but sleep apnea is a SERIOUS matter. If your spouse notices that your breathing stops while you sleep, go see a doctor, folks! Dr. D
Hrmm that was weird, my comment got eaten. Anywho I wanted to say that it’s nice to know that someone else also touched on this as I had trouble finding the same information elsewhere. This was the first place that helped me understand this. Thanks.
lol some of the remarks bloggers post really are a bit spacey, every so often i think whether they realistically read the content articles and posts before putting a comment or whether they only gloss over the article title and write the first ideas that pops into their brain. anyway, it really is helpful to read clever commentary occasionally in contrast to the exact same, old opinion which i frequently notice through the web.
If you’re male, over the age of 40, and overweight, you are at high risk for developing sleep apnea. You may have already developed it and don’t know it yet. If you are chronically fatigued and never feel as though you’ve gotten a good night’s rest, it’s a good sign that you could have the condition.
Agree. I actually have a very mild case, but I do sleep better when I wear the mask. I don’t take it with me when I travel because of the hassles of airport security, but I don’t travel as much as I used to, so that’s no big deal. I encourage people to achieve a healthy weight and have themselves checked out if their partner notices them having sleep issues.